What did cassettes ever do for us?

My first Hip-Hop/ Music/ Lifestyle and other stuff blog kicks off with my current obsession Mixtapes.

Lily Allen is fat and lazy? Damn it! Apart from the fact that she looks like her Dad and seems very annoying if you knew her –you can just tell-, she was like the perfect woman! Apparently; Lily wants lypo, it’s crazy, I watched a program called ‘My Breasts and Me’ on BBC Three last night and there was a poor 19 year old girl with two bags of sugar for breasts, I mean Lily; can we put this in perspective? I guess to be fair it was white sugar; but still, she had back problems.

Enough with Lily Allen and her misshapen forehead. Is it misshapen or just big? The fringe of secrets prevents us ever knowing! I want to give you a present. I would like to introduce you to one of my favouritest websites. You may already know about DatPiff.com what do you want a medal? I have medals, but you weren’t the best dancer at that dancing thing at the Community Centre you went to that one time because your sister and her friends were going. If you do not know about DatPiff.com then I am giving you something you should cherish. I, as a Tego, am a hip-hop fan. I understand that a lot of you are not, you should be. Not just because I say so, but because I gave you DatPiff.com too. DatPiff roughly translates in hip-hop language as “That Really good weed” alas this site does not offer really good weed, or any weed for that matter, but it does offer you every mixtape like ever. I fall in and out of love with mixtapes, sometimes I can’t stand them and want your prog-rock equivalent in hip-hop terms so I can feel all clever and soulful like. But as the human condition dictates, sometimes I feel like getting ignant! I mean Lilly Allen ignant!*

Your modern mixtape isn’t what you’d call a “Mixed-tape”, nobody uses tapes any more, in fact I read on NME.com the other day that Curry’s are going to stop stocking tapes. I actually have a Dictaphone that runs on cassettes. I’m going to have to join the 21st century and get a USB one or something now, it can sit alongside my USB air freshener and my USB desk heater… there really aren’t enough USB ports on a standard computer, or in the world for that matter. The other thing about your modern mixtape which separates itself from your standard “Mixed-tape” is that it’s very, very rarely mixed. I don’t know why they’re still called mixtapes to be honest. The actual purpose of the modern un-mixed C.D is to get a rapper to record a load of material that wouldn’t be considered album worthy, throw it on a C.D and get a DJ to shout over it. HOW GREAT DOES THAT SOUND? But seriously, they are fantastic. There are concepts and stuff, there are things a rapper can get away with on a mixtape that perhaps a major label wouldn’t be too happy about him doing on an album, like sample ridiculously un-clearable songs or rap about how much they hate their labels. I’m not selling this very well am I? Okay. Instead of trying to sell on their collective merits I will sell on their individual merits by breaking down my current favourite mixtapes –all of which are available for free on DatPiff.com-.

Joe Budden and DJ On Point- Mood Muzik 2

In my humble opinion; the greatest of all mixtapes. Joey’s a New Jersey native with a lot to prove. His self-titled debut album was pretty sugar coated, very dull and pretty unsuccessful. Joe’s angry about this, as you would be. As a former angel dust addict and mental patient Budden draws for the “Emo-card” with an authentic passion. The mixtape features all original production which is rare –most mixtapes feature rappers re-working other people’s instrumentals- and is absolutely relentless in it’s chest punching honesty. Songs like ‘Three Sides To a Story’ which is an epic tale of drug selling, child abuse and teen pregnancy, sees the tale of big brother, little sister and step father told from all three perspectives with quite different motives but exactly the same outcome.

Key Tracks: ‘Three Sides To a Story’, ‘If I Die Tomorrow’, ‘Old School Mouse’

Uncle Murda and DJ Green Lantern- Say Uncle: 2 Hard For Hip-Hop

Uncle Murda is going to be an acquired taste. I only recently acquired the taste myself. If mixtapes are ignorant, then Uncle Murda is our lord and saviour! Brooklyn’s finest has killed NINE people, he hates the Police and really, really hates snitches! On this, his third mixtape Murda wrestles with his conscience on ‘Mind Full Of Demons’ when in his sleep Uncle aka. Murk is visited by three of his victims who attempt to reason with our hero, “That shit wasn’t worth it, you feel me son? I said hell naw. You was trynna kill me son” ultimately Murk outsmarts his imagination by threatening to “Find out where you kids go to school at” genius!

Key Tracks: ‘Mind Full Of Demons’, Murderer Part 2’ Feat. Akon, ‘I Shot the Sheriff’

Tru Life and DJ J-Love- Tru York

Tru Life is another rapper who’s probably a little bit too real for rap music. He made a name for himself in the late nineties for paying Mobb Deep’s Prodigy for a verse on his debut album. When Prodigy gave the same verse away to an underground mixtape Tru was so offended that he felt the need to enter a recording studio in Queens Bridge, New York where Cyprus Hill legend DJ Muggs and his protégé were overseeing a session for Havoc and Prodigy aka, Mobb Deep, Tru stripped Havoc and Prodigy naked, took their jewels, their finance and their pride. He came back around in 2005 with ‘New New York’ which challenged New York to rediscover its identity which he said had been lost to copy-cat L.A gang culture. Which is true. A few people took exception to this, mainly Harlem’s Diplomats crew fronted by Cam’ron –who has a fetish for pink clothing- and Jim Jones –who has a fetish for tight clothing- Tru Life decided that he would dedicate a comedy mixtape to the pair, well half a mixtape ‘Tru York’ is 50% humorous jabs at the duo the other half is just a really good mixtape.

Key Tracks: ‘Get That Paper’, ‘The Dips Is Ova’, ‘N.Y, L.A’ Feat Snoop, ‘In Dem Jeans’

If you’re worried about downloading whole files like this and the legal implications of doing so, don’t be, since DJ Drama was arrested for bootlegging earlier in the year all mixtapes have been made available for free to avoid any other law suits.

Links: DatPiff.com, Uncle Murda MySpace, Tru Life MySpace, Joe Budden MySpace

*Is Lily Allen ignant? Maybe not. Why do I pick on Lilly Allen so? Well the reasons are two-fold. The first is that I believe Lily Allen will read this and try and fight me or something. That would be so Lilly. The other reason is that I was going to post a news story on the front page about Lilly Allen but realised I’d probably get loads of emails from like Tom and Marc and Dave and whatever telling me that Lilly Allen doesn’t belong on the site. So I’m kinda pissed off that Lily would actually put me in that hypothetical position. What a bitch.