Sleepy Hollow, Particle Acceleration and Freddie Valentine's Variety Show

PARSLEY'S COMMLOCK

Film Review : Sleepy Hollow
As someone that does film reviews, I embarrass myself with famous films that I still haven't seen. I finally caught up with this 1999 Tim Burton effort on DVD.

It was obviously from a while ago as Johnny Depp was cherub-like beautiful compared to his rather frightening look in Sweeney Todd that I previously reviewed. in it he plays policeman Ichabod Crane in a very young United States. So young, in fact, that several of its inhabitants talk with - shock - an English accent.

After making a nuisance of himself in town suggesting that crimes should be solved by science, he is sent/exiled to Sleepy Hollow, where suspiciously supernatural deaths (decapitations by an alleged headless horseman) are taking place. An early one is that of a non-speaking character played by Martin Landau. He was the main star of Space:1999, along with his then wife Barbara Bain.

In the real year 1999 Landau failed to make it to the celebratory sci-fi convention in Culver City, California. Fellow actor Nick Tate was keen to let the attendees know what a great guy Landau was and how sorry he would have been not to be there. Landau was enjoying something of a renaissance at the time, having earned an oscar hit with his portrayal of Bela Lugosi in Tim Burton's film 'Ed Wood'.

Burton delightfully subverts the alleged 'science' of Crane, in a way visually reminiscent of the disgusting 'high tech' of Terry Gilliam's film 'Brazil'. Crane 's devices usually include some kind of eye glass that renders his face into a distorted nightmare look as he uses it.

Successive characters are gruesomely beheaded until Crane can piece together what is happening and move towards identifying a culprit. The plot keeps you gripped as it twists around the characters, and several are killed off with awful and spectacular supernatural ferocity.

Some Americans are entranced by things that are 200 or so years old. I wonder if they hanker for an America that resembles the bizarre one illustrated here. It retains the trademark weirdness, not necessarily realistic, of Tim Burton's visions. I'm starting to think he's a bit of a genius, and nothing if not prolific. Several famous directors' reputations are built on one or two films but I'm losing count of his.

Overall Review: Thumbs firmly up. Compulsive viewing, with humour, horror and suspense in good measures. A kind of horror Inspector Morse.

Science Review : Particle Acceleration
Possibly the most expensive bet in history is being resolved on the border between Switzerland and France. 'I bet the universe started like this' said some scientists, and now billions have been spent to try and prove it.

Given that France is in the EU and Switzerland is not, it is possible that a border post should be set up between French and Swiss sides to insist EU rates of tax are paid by particles entering from the Swiss side.

The other thought that occurs to me is that the best person to 'press the button' and cause particles to collide would have been Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin, believing as she allegedly does in creationism...

Concert Review : Freddie Valentine's Variety Show, Battersea Barge 11/09/08
Popped in at this great intimate restaurant/show venue to check out this new monthly night starring my very good friend Freddie Valentine, and a handpicked selection of the finest, singers, comedians, musicians and other performers.

Unfortunately I missed the first half-hour of this jam-packed show, but I still saw many magnificent performances. For example an absolutely amazing magician called Katherine Rhodes stunned us by knowing the word that someone in the audience had picked out of a random page of Jimmy Young's biography. Yes, amazing wasn't it ? Jimmy Young! Seriously, it was great to be able to view such top notch magic from close up.

Voodoo Mick, my Mum's favourite, gave us several songs, including a spirited performance of American Pie. Two gents going under the name of Moonfish Rumba provided rather splendid comedy rap, with a particularly beguiling use of the Pinocchio song. They wore sharp suits and one of them had an extreme moustache of the Billy Childish variety. Valentine regular Barry Chester was on fantastic form as Mahatma Gandhi selling his sandal on eBay, and the 'real' (Jamaican) Winston Churchill. Surrealist country music star Salvador Dali Parton gave a full-on rendition of 9 to 5 whilst creating a new work of art, and the evening ended with a rousing cockney knees up.

All in all it was an amazing night. At this excellent venue Freddie has created a regular monthly feast of fun on the second Thursday of the month (the next one is on Thursday October 10th).

parsley@gardenrecords.com [www.gardenrecords.com]