"Hello we are No Cars and we have flown here from Japan for one night!", she beams, gazing at us with expectant eyeballs. "We are kidding! But some people really believe we are on world tour! Ha ha!"
Drinks are spilt. Gobs are creaking open. There's a girl group on stage - and Japan certainly seems to be their point of origin - but do human beings this uncomplicated really still exist?
Once you get over their innocence, the second most striking thing about No Cars is their gimmick; it's a sheet music stand in front of the stage. On it are about 10 cards with illustrations on them. After each song, they pull the cards off to reveal cartoons, maps... weird doodles.
Which may well be very 'Subterranean Homesick Blues' - but it's twisted too. The band play 1950s heartbreak classics with the odd screaming breakdown thrown in to keep the punks happy. Japanese bands are well known for ripping off the West and making it seem fresh - but this is actually moving.
"Next song is everyone's favourite!" she says, introducing 'Tuna Tuna Tuna'. It's good, and I agree that it's my favourite. But then she says "Next song is everyone's favourite!" introducing '12345 Rock', which is also good in a Belle and Sebastian kinda way. But hang on - surely logic has gone out the window here?
Whatever. No Cars are a bubblegum band, and the audience is chewing. "We have to go back to Japan now but we see you later!" the singer announces - and though we don't believe her, we're happy to encourage the new Queens of Cute.
Best new band in Glasgow, by a mile!
...Any more snooker cliches?
...Second track sounds like a more snarly mid-60s Who. Excellent.
...First one sounds like Sean Ryder having a flashback but second track is a killer.
...once you've drunk a bottle of Maker's Mark in Copehagen?
...The more I watch it, the more I like it.
...Sex on Fire is good once you've drunk a bottle of Maker's Mark in Copenhagen
...
POPPY AND THE JEZEBELS' REALITY RECORD SHOPS OF CHOICE ARE:
SWORDFISH RECORDS, BIRMINGHAM
POLAR BEAR RECORDS, KINGS HEATH
"Ok – we’re gonna write about the two independent shops that we grew up visiting in Birmingham, where we...
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...
Crank up your broadband connection and prepare to download this enormous and quite excellent mp3 from Envelopes. It's from a mixtape - Soup of Germs - that was given away...
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